Today is a night im crying lot due my offer got super low and still couldn't find a good job. Everyone always update with my current job and for them im the one always who love to change job. Seriously, am i? If not because of Jing Si im still jobless for almost 7 months. Im glad and i still looking for better job due cultural shock. Its ok and comfort to staying there but im looking for someone can assist me and guided to better of me. Ok, come back to original version today. Last week i went for interview which is my fav working in travel agent. I did for myself to low down my expectations salary from 3.8k to 3k only due i understand travel line salary is kinda low. Waiting two days finally got the mail from the boss. She only offer me rm2k as executive which is my past 4 years ago salary. Im experience and not a fresh grad.... Why? I really dont get it! Am i really bad til like this? I am so so down and finally cry out. So tiring and exhausted keep looking for job.
Just now i felt sad in sudden dunno why because of his wording makes me think of previous relationship. Its because of work and reducing an accompany. I told him my buddy wedding on wednesday at alor setar and he told me see first how. Then i told him that nonit see first coz im sure will go because is my buddy and yeah im expecting he will join me but he is not when i ask him are u really wont come that day? He said he might got work to do. Then i asked i will go til alor setar wor.. He said how about your friend? This sentence makes me started feel worry. Will everything re-act past 7 years again? Its because im time to wasting his (ex) time on work hard, yeah which is from beginning til better then he is belong to someone else now. Its doesn't matter anymore but why im worry also might be little dot told me that i had wasting 7years to teaching a boy become a good man and husband now am i going to teach new boy again? Which is the same situation from beginning work hard and of course im supporting but this time i will waiting for how long? Seriously, im ready for marriage but i know its not the time yet due he is not satisfied current result. But izit when touch on marriage must do everything in a line first? Im so complicated due im dont have high pay salary.. Commitment stucked.. Relationship makes me feel insecure.. Should i go oversea as a bet for my life? Will he feel sad when im apart? I guess im dead! I really cant do it.. I worry he will sad although he is supporting me! Kill me pls.. what's an emo night even im still crying while typing!
Good night!
